Bit of a wall of text here, so tldr; the communication issues are alienating the playerbase and making every problem worse.
Keep in mind for the admins: nobody stays here looking to have a bad experience. You are getting such strong feedback because players care and they want things improved. They're hoping for you to do better.
(I’m putting down this wall of text because I genuinely like this server and wish to continue playing here, but you're making it hard since many friends and opponents are leaving)
Setting aside how you ignore player suggestions, the communication issues are becoming a major concern. People getting banned on discord or in-game for joking(!) about the server or its management is alarming. Banning players for changing the launcher icon on their own desktop, for having capslock names (easily achieved using a Japanese or Chinese keyboard btw) and labeling it hacking, or for joking in a legion discord server, breaks down trust that's hard to rebuild once lost. There's a major difference between satire, mocking server issues, and actual personal attacks or threats. The latter is unacceptable, but not tolerating the former is kind of totalitarian.
Of course, being a private server where staff is accessible, criticism can feel more personal than it is, and things that aren’t necessarily dogpiling might feel that way when it's often just 1 or 2 staff members interacting with the community (often in live chats). Still, it doesn't change the expectation that you should be able to handle criticism (fair or not), and if you can't, maybe reconsider running a server of this magnitude. Consider hiring more staff, or re-evaluating how involved your team is with the community? Not saying you should back off completely and let small fires run rampant. Assuming staff and admins are adults, and the community expects certain standards (hopefully including self-irony, although expectations can be tricky).
The cocktail mess
Looking at the community's outrage one at a time might seem like overreacting, but this being the third (or fourth?) event in a row with sudden changes in drop rates, loot chances or instance entries, you really shouldn't be shocked the community reacts as it does. Not learning from previous events that players naturally go for the most profitable effort/reward ratio doesn’t impress when this has happened enough to be old hat. Not even bothering to apologize before getting defensive is downright embarrassing.
Customer service 101: when you mess up (especially big), you apologize, and find a solution working for both suppliers and clients.
Telling players it's “your own fault for not farming the first 2 days” shows poor taste for several obvious reasons. Claiming you can't cater to everyone and “what about players away for the whole event” is a slippery slope that dodges the main issue: you made a mistake with big consequences and refuse to respond adequately.
With free pixels on a private server, it's absurd the admins refuse to be accommodating (surely, the cost of this being the final straw for many active players is bigger than compromising?). Most of the community isn't asking for freebies, just equal chances at event rewards, whether by doing 5 steel rakes or 50 steel rose cargos a day, or just casual play with some reward drops. (Agreed removing reset scrolls was right, but should have been from the start. Those gambling on reset scroll removals now profit immensely, worsening the mess.)
The gap between having 6 boxes for ~10 min effort compared to sharing 3-6 boxes with 6-12 others for 30 to 60 min (with a real risk of scam) is staggering.
Even Gameforge handled this better. The first time retail had the alchemy event, they admitted a mistake with fire temple (unlimited entries, rushable in 2 min) in the drop list. Yet, they let it stay for the event duration, as cutting it after launch would be unfair to those who couldn't farm at first. Following events were adjusted. (also, while activity dipped elsewhere, brokers filled with affordable manastones, giving the economy a healthy boost.)
Please do not take this post as one big personal attack. As said, I generally enjoy the server but feel this issue needs urgent addressing over my other concerns (like the lack of pvp). A static patch server will grow stale if not managed well, but right now the real threat is the communication problem.
However, I recently joined the Aion Riftshade beta, and I see a whole other picture. Active GMs and devs in their Discord, no arbitrary bans, and actual listening to players. It's the best Aion private server for 2026, with zero pay to win nonsense. They got EU hosting in Frankfurt so the ping is super low, no ExitLag needed. I'd say, if retail is disappointing, Aion Riftshade is a promising alternative when it launches in Q1 2026.